Hit Pack #1
Copyright/Publisher: Zeppelin Games, Release Year: 1992,
Genre: Various, Number Of Players: 1 or 2

It just goes to show you, the Codies aren't the only bods to do four-packs. Here's one fresh from the Zeppelin's country mansion and indoor arboretum-cum-fish processing centre.


Kenny Dalglish Soccer Manager
Yes, it's a management game. But it's all controlled with the joystick, and it's fast and gives you on-screen highlights of the game. If you must own a soccer management sim, then this is an excellent one to go for.


Rally Simulator
Hum. Not a simulator in any sense of the word, but a top-down view racing game. Burn round a well-confusing course, trying to avoid the other peeps.

Not as good as Badlands or Super Sprint, but better than a punch in the ear from an irate panda.


Mountain Bike Racer
Again, not really a simulator at all. The task facing you is simple. You must ride a slightly weedy mountain bike (seen from side away) over a series of tough bumps.

You also fall off with astonishing regularity. It's difficult, it's not very addictive and to be honest it's incredibly annoying.

We've got to be talking about the worst game since Crapsoft's Pond Simulator (and I just made that one up).


Para Assault Course
Sideways-scrolling waggler. Flap your joystick as fast as you can. Jump over things, try not to smash your head on any stone walls.

Friends tell me that this is exactly what the Parachute Regiment is like.


INTRO SCREEN
As the weird tall people close in, one of them takes the plunge and fires! Oh and it wobbles past the goalie and into the net. The crowd goes wild (both of them).
FRAME RATE 49%
For a quid a throw, it's not really worth it. The best is Rally Simulator. Kenny Dalglish is good for a management sim, but the other two are as sad as as people who still talk about 'The Hit Parade', thinking they're trendy.

Simulator? Simulator!!? Somehow I think the truth is being slightly stretched to cover a game which has never been within a hundred yards of a muddy car.
Yes, I know it's a boring screen, but get used to it. You'll fall off a lot if you decide to load up Mountain Bike Simulator. I'm glad I'm being paid to play it.
Gosh, that water is extremely cold. I thought the Army went round shooting people. I didn't realise that you had to jump over small ponds as well.