Fatty PHIL KING's been worried about his lack of fitness lately, so he's looking for a suitable sport to play. Cricket seems just the ticket: doing nothing for ages in the outfield, he can even get away with swigging cider and taking a nap.

It's just not cricket, is it? For a start there's no arcade action. This is pure management, and even then there's not that many options.

First, pick one of seven cricketing countries (no Zimbabew or South Africa here) for you and the computer opponent. Then select your eleven from a squad of real batsmen, bowlers and all-rounders - all the relevant stats are shown for both test and first-class matches.

You can now choose from three lengths of tour (either at home or abroad). All include a combination of one-day, three-day and full test matches. The batting side gets to select the opening batsmen, while the fielding side picks two starting bowlers and the full fielding order (with the wicket-keeper at number 11).

Sadly, the TV station concerned must be on a tighter budget than BBC2. There's no tiny cameras in the stumps here, not even the standard elevated behind-the-bowler biew. Instead, the delivery is shown side-on, resulting in one of three outcomes: the ball is hit for a six, it's caught, or the batsman is bowled out.

There's just no variety at all and the flickscreen graphics look worse than Goochie's designer stubble. All this would be just about acceptable if there was some sort of tactical depth.

But there isn't. All the fielding side can do is change the bowlers when things are going ' wrong. The batting side can't even do this: no instructions can be given to the batsmen to speed up the run rate etc, so all you can do is watch the scoreboard and hope for the best.

Great eh? I mean, I remember one of the very first Speccy games that was better than this - and that was written in BASIC! At least you felt part of the proceedings, choosing a bowler for every over and telling the batsmen when to run. World Cricket's woeful lack of such simple, yet involving, features leaves the player completely stumped.

PHIL 22%

I quite enjoyed picking my elevent from the modern-day players (even though they're hardly gentlemen), but after that the game was on a very sticky wicket indeed.

The scoreboard flashes away like a streaker at Lords (we never had them in my day...shame!) without the players actually doing anything, apart from in the odd highlight.

Not only did I have the frustration of not playing one of my legendary innings, I couldn't contribute any of my captaining skills either. It's enough to make me turn in my grave!

19%